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Cost of COVID: Unwanted distance takes a toll on family members of those with dementia, Alzheimer's

The Alzheimer’s Association says losing the last few months has left families already pressed for time with few options

MACON, Ga. — Too much isolation isn’t good for anyone, but when it comes to people with dementia it can be particularly devastating.

As we continue looking at the ‘Cost of COVID,’ Amyre Makupson with Mercer University's Center for Collaborative Journalism shows us how shelter-in-place orders are putting a lot of unwanted distance between family members who are already mentally miles apart.

“They call it the long goodbye for a reason,” said Pace Tyson.

Tyson is very familiar with Alzheimer’s disease.

“Every day you start saying goodbye to a piece of that person’s personality or their habits,” he said.

Tyson’s father died from the disease and now less than a decade later, his mother is battling the illness from a nursing home.

“I really took my time with my mom for granted,” he said.

It’s a struggle made worse by the COVID-19 pandemic. He hasn’t been able to physically see his mother in seven months, and he can’t get that time back.

MaryLea Boatwright Quinn, the director of government affairs with the Alzheimer’s Association says those months leave families already pressed for time with few options.

"The average length of stay for somebody in assisted living or memory care units is, let's say 16 to 18 months. We're already six months into that 16 to 18 months and family members haven't been able to see their loved ones,” said Quinn. “We've heard just about how people with dementia and other residents are struggling with this isolation from their family members and it's causing irreparable damage."

The damage seems to be causing memories to fade faster.

"Shortly after Mother's Day, she didn't know I was her son anymore. Now she knows my face, but she doesn't know our relationship,” said Tyson.

“As dementia progress, there can be times or moments that people forget their family members, forget a name, but we know that they are very aware… often through nonverbal connection,” said Quinn.

Those non-verbal connections like a simple smile help people like Tyson feel better, for now.

“My mom, you can see her smile through the window and that makes it all worth it,” he said.

Under Gov. Brian Kemp’s latest shelter-in-place extension, nursing homes are now being asked to develop a plan for re-opening in phases to visitors. Because no two homes are the same, you will need to check with the facility on its approach to allowing family members back inside.

The Alzheimer's Association has around the clock assistance for anyone who needs some guidance in dealing with a loved one with dementia during COVID-19. You can contact them here.

MORE ON THE COST OF COVID

Crawford County seniors struggle to stay connected during pandemic

Macon colleges find ways to adapt programs during pandemic

Macon nonprofits struggle to stay afloat amid dwindling volunteers, funding

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